A Cowboy Vigilante Lassoes a Bike Thief in the Beaver State

Have you guys heard about the cowboy who jumped on his horse and chased down a bike thief last Friday?

You heard me right. A guy named Robert Borba was loading dog food and camping equipment into his car when he heard a woman in the Walmart parking lot screaming that someone had just stolen her bike.

So Borba JUMPED ON HIS HORSE, Long John, to chase after the guy as he cycled away. Catching up with him, Borba then LASSOED HIM AROUND THE LEGS.

borbo
This guy (Denise Baratta/The Medford Mail Tribune via AP)
Victorino Arellano-Sanchez, the thief, tried to escape. But Borba held him tight until the police arrived to apprehend him.

“I seen this fella trying to get up to speed on a bicycle. I wasn’t going to catch him on foot. I just don’t run very fast… I use a rope every day, that’s how I make my living. If it catches cattle pretty good, it catches a bandit pretty good,” Borba said.

Which is exactly what you’d expect a cowboy to say after apprehending a bike thief.

I LOVE that he called the guy a “fella” and a “bandit.” And that he had a horse and lasso at the ready in a Walmart parking lot.It’s like something straight out of the Wild West…

Except it happened in Oregon, not Texas.

I’ve never actually been to Texas, but we non-Texans have the impression that cowboy culture is alive and well in the Lone Star State. We get that idea from things like Texas calling itself the “Lone Star State” and Remembering the Alamo.

Pee-Wee-alamo-620x350
Where some of us got our first Texas impressions
Oregon, on the other hand, conjures images closer to episodes of Portlandia. I don’t know if the rest of America knows this, but we Californians have a strange relationship with Oregon. They’re our neighbors and tend to be crunchy liberals like us (relatively speaking), but ON STEROIDS… a lot more Nader voters in 2000, for example.

Portlandia.jpg
How DARE you out-hipster us, Oregon?
So Californians tend to either romanticize Oregonians, moving into their lush territory in droves, or see them as granola crack.

I’ve heard Oregonians don’t care for Californians much, on the other hand, believing our invasion drives up property values. And by “don’t care for us,” I mean chase us out with pitchforks and flaming sticks.

Either way, I never pictured a Old Western style thief wrangling to go down in the Beaver State.

aunt-bee
Fine work, boys. Fine work
Good for Robert Borbo. I think we can all agree that lassoing a bicycle thief from  horseback is mighty cool.

Hopefully, Borba celebrated his victory with a homemade slice of Miss Maybelle’s delicious apple pie before paying court to the lovely Miss Primrose on her family’s porch.

 

 

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7 thoughts on “A Cowboy Vigilante Lassoes a Bike Thief in the Beaver State”

  1. This might be the best story I’ve heard all week. Not trying to sympathize with the “bandit” exactly, but how embarrassing would it be to get caught not by the cops, but by a lasso-wielding, Walmart-shopping cowboy? Totally ruins the street cred.

    Also, as a Texan, I feel the need to inform you that I’ve never in my life owned a pair of cowboy boots 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh, absolutely… That’s got to be one of the most embarrassing ways for a bike thug to fail. Right after getting dropped by an 85 year old Karate Master (I don’t know if that’s ever happened, but I’m hoping it has).

      Of course not, I’m just teasing! I’ve actually owned a pair myself, but they weren’t REAL cowboy boots, just the LA lets-play-cowgirl style, haha

      I’ve never been to Texas, though I have family there. I’ve met some Texans and really liked all of them, even though none of them were wearing giant cowboy hats like the movies say they do. So disappointing 🙂

      And as a Californian, I’ve never actually had my aura read or sent my cat to a past lives therapist… Dang those state stereotypes, lol

      Like

    1. Weird, I just checked my spam folder on a whim and found this comment. That’s so strange because you post all the time.

      I’ve pulled out some good comments from this folder before. Worth checking, I guess!

      Funny that you’d think this happened near you 🙂 I was shocked it happened on the West Coast.

      There’s plenty of offbeat stuff going on out here, but it usually doesn’t involve cowboys, haha

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I may have to do a quick internet search and see if that elderly martial arts thing has happened! I don’t think anything would surprise me at this point haha.

    You’re already more Texan than I am, with those cowboy boots (even if they were pretend)! Unfortunately, I can’t defend all the stereotypes of this place, because I’ve totally seen a guy ride horseback through a drive-thru restaurant. And a business in my area has put up the most gigantic Texas flag you’ve ever seen in your life. Sigh.

    I think taking your cat to a past lives therapist might just provide good material for a future blog post haha. You know it’d be good! And probably weird.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s true. I shouldn’t overlook the creative possibilities of that experience… Who wouldn’t read the “My Cat’s Past Life Trauma” article? 🙂

      Drive through on horseback??? Wow, I would LOVE to see that…

      Liked by 1 person

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