My three-year-old daughter Bridget has been blaming all of her problems on Catfish lately, even though he’s her favorite stuffed animal. He’s a Siamese-looking cat with a fish on his collar. She snuggles up to him every night even though he keeps wetting her bed. And I was already having a rough day the other […]Read More The Adventures of Catfish, The Poop Goblin
As I’ve mentioned before, my two-year-old daughter Bridget is a baby Viking: a freakishly-strong blonde who lives to dance, eat, and occasionally conquer all rules of civilized Christian society by violently head-butting them with her berserker rage. And tonight, she waged a war on the meaning of pants. Everything had been going so well. Earlier, she’d finally asked […]Read More Bridget The Viking Wages a War on Pants
Hello everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful Memorial Day and fun three-day weekend. We sure did. My crazy, high-energy toddlers can be challenging (aren’t they all?), but they really crack me up. The entertainment value alone makes it all worth it, so I thought I’d share some of the highlight reel: Dad Makes […]Read More Memorial Day Weekend Hilarity
Brontë: I need a toilet. Me (feeding Bridget): You want to go potty? Brontë: No, I just need a toilet. Brontë toddles off, returning with her Minnie Mouse potty. She puts it on the floor and just as I start to get excited, flips the lid down and stands on top of it. Using her […]Read More False Breakthrough in Potty-Training
Brontë and I continue to work on potty training, and I’ve just about exhausted my bag of tricks. It’s starting to feel like a two-year-old has taken me hostage. She has her finger right above the poop trigger, and either I meet her crazy demands, or this whole place is going to explode. Recently, she demanded that a […]Read More Poop Warfare: The Continuing Potty-Training Saga
Big stink lines wafted from my two-year old daughter. She was blurring the background view as she stood in her overripe diaper. “Did you poop, Brontë?” “NO!” She yelled, running behind the couch. “It’s okay if you pooped,” I reassured her, “Everybody poops.” Popping her eyes above the couch, she considered what I was saying. […]Read More Everybody poops. Everybody.
Nowadays, it feels like early potty training is part of the overall drive toward competitive parenting, where we first hook kids up to Baby Einstein playlists in infancy then shuffle them around in soccer mom minivans from one after-school activity to the next in a mad dash to outcompete.Read More Detailed Parenting Advice about Controlled Crapping