Sibling Torture Goes Sci-Fi

Just overheard my 6-year-old daughter convincing her baby sister that I’m actually an android who hides all the wires under my hair. It was truly inspiring. “Bedtime” will henceforth be referred to as “System Update Time.” Every once in a while, I may have to pause, mid-sentence, to stare into space. To keep them on […]

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Invisible Friends to the Rescue

I was getting the kids into the car the other day, after hanging out a local park, when I discovered a back seatbelt was jammed. It absolutely wouldn’t budge. I thought about how we’re technically allowed to put a kid in the front seat when the back is full before kicking myself again for not […]

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My Daughter Misgenders the Cat

My four-year-old daughter Bridget’s favorite toy ever is “Catfish,” a stuffed-animal Siamese cat with a fish drawing on its collar. And though she loves him, he’s clearly her fall guy. Messy room, dirty bed, broken toys… she’s been insisting Catfish orchestrated all these petty toddler crimes and more. He’s been so naughty, in fact, we […]

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Bee Stings and Toddler Vengeance

As you’ve probably guessed, I’m pretty fond of my kids and of being a mom, overall. Maybe it’s the whole dedicated-parenting-blog-thing that gave it away, or how I kind of flipped out on the anti-child childfree folks a while back… But I have to admit that I’m a bigger fan of kids than I am […]

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Sibling Torture Tactics

My husband John and I were both only children, so by having two kids, we knew we were setting forth into a brave new world. Both of us, like many only children, always dreamed about having a sibling we could pal around with. Of course, these were imaginary siblings, the pinky-swearing, truce-keeping pretend siblings who were so much better […]

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